a break from packing

Less than two weeks until we move. So, I'm busy packing. God, I hate moving. The house looks like complete cardboard crap. And the books! Oh, the books. Curse us for being such bibliophiles.


There is nothing really that comes to mind at the moment that I want to write about, but I did promise myself that I would try to come around this way more often to get into the habit of blogging again and keeping up on my friends blogs.

One of the things I remember feeling when I was previously a more devoted blogger was this feeling of not knowing what to say. Of not feeling clever enough. Or having a smart or great response to share. I remember reading these amazing posts by these incredibly talented people I am privileged to call my friends, and yet feeling a bit of inferiority and inability to conjure a comment worthy of their incredible writing. Of course, I told myself, "Sarah, it's the thought that matters; your heart is in the right place, just comment." And yet, so very often, I'd find myself leaving their blogs, impacted by their post, and not sharing anything in return out of frustration for not having a decent response to such writing.

Man, I've got issues. I'm not denying it.

Well, amidst the packing, there is still the every day needs to tend to, and the next of those pressing needs is dinner. So I'm off. To cook. No clue what. Wish me luck.

moving.... again

When we moved into this house in January we signed a six month lease with the university. The university owns properties like these to rent to new faculty if they need them. We were assured that they would continue to renew the lease as long as we needed for up to two years. Well, our six month lease was recently up, and we requested another six months.

Much to our shock, dismay, and trepidation, we recently found out that they have changed their mind; they want us out. And in only a matter of weeks. Apparently there is a student housing shortage, the students come first, and they are asking us to leave. We were immediately upset and overwhelmed. It was just crazy to absorb the fact that we only had a matter of weeks to not only get out ... but to find a place to live.

To complicate matters, we are not in the position to buy a house. We are still trying to get the short sale on our home in Tucson to go through. Looking into the rental market in town - specifically in what is now our children's school district - was discouraging. L is already enrolled in the elementary school here in town, has made friends and adjusted beautifully; E has just been accepted to their pre-k program for this fall. It would break my heart to have to start over, yet again, in a different school, all because we couldn't find something in the district. And yet it is all the more difficult to find a place when limited to the school district.

So we were under a lot of stress. All of last week I devoted to meeting realtor after realtor; driving around searching for properties; calling listings found online, in the paper, and in person. After viewing everything there was available, and then, by networking, and even asking if houses for sale would consider renting, I found out about a few additional properties that were "secretly" for rent (apparently they are hesitant to advertise them, because legally they can't discriminate, but they don't want to rent to students). After discovering this "secret rental market," we finally found a perfect little place tucked away in the woods 3 miles from the campus.

We signed the papers Friday afternoon and made it official. We are relieved. But we are also overwhelmed with the job of moving all our worldly possessions again. But at least we have somewhere to move them to and our children will be going to their school, and for that, I am grateful.

the story of a friend

During the time we spend here in this world friends enter our lives in many different ways, shapes and forms. Accidents happen every day and you never know when they will happen, how they will happen, to whom, or why. This is the story of a friend who came into my life and who left this world, as far as I'm concerned, much too soon.

I moved to Tucson Arizona in the summer of 2004. I didn't know a soul. I started graduate school and made my first friends. On July 15, 2005 I became a mom and made some more friends. After the birth of my first child I also began my journey of getting in shape and falling in love with running. Little did I know, somewhere else in Tucson, there was a mom I would meet four years later who share the same passion.

I welcomed my second child into the world in February of 2007. After his birth, I was still focused on staying in shape and running. I registered on a site called SeeMommyRun hoping that maybe I might find another mom in Tucson who liked to run and would want to go running together.

On May 26, 2009 I got my first - and only - e-mail from someone off of SeeMommyRun. Her name was Kristina.

Sarah,

I just joined seeMOMMYrun and noticed you have been a member for a couple years. Your zip is the same as mine. Your pace is about the same as mine. I was hoping that you`re still interested in running. My son is 3 and I don`t get home until 7pm some nights. I like to take my son along, but am new to jogging with a stroller. I`d like to find someone to join me because I`m always reluctant to go out in the dark alone. Please let me know if you`d like to get together for a jog. Thanks! Kristina

It turns out Kristina messaged a few ladies, but I was the only one that responded, and little did we know this was the beginning of a great friendship. She and I met, and continued to meet, for runs together. We'd most often meet at the paved 3-mile path at Reid Park with her son Frankie in her single jogging-stroller, and my two children in my double jogging-stroller.

It wasn't very long after I met Kristina that I introduced her to my friends. My dear friend Jenn who I also ran, drank coffee, and had play dates with quickly and happily welcomed Kristina in on the running dates at Reid Park. I also quickly extended the invitation to Kristina to join the book club we had with a bunch of friends who were also mothers of young ones. Through the book club we met another runner through another one of our friends: Amy. And Amy soon began joining us for our Reid Park runs, too.

Kristina, Jenn and I all shared the love for a great cup of coffee. Across the street from the 3-mile loop at Reid Park there was a Starbucks, and soon we began incorporating a post-run cup of coffee as a reward. After our runs we'd order our coffee and then we would take the kids to the playground at Reid Park to play as a reward for them sitting in their strollers through another one of our runs.

As Kristina and I continued our running dates, we also signed up for several races together. The beautiful thing about running with someone else is that when one of you are having a rough day, you have someone to help motivate you and see you through it, very much like life. Some days we had it, some days we didn't. Some races were great, others were disappointments. But we always stuck it out and were there to support each other.

The bond we forged over the months, and then years, of running together astounded us both. I remember discussing with Kristina one day, on one of our runs, how her one e-mail from SeeMommyRun changed both of our lives for the better. We were mutually and deeply grateful for our friendship.

In December 2010 my husband, children and I moved back to my home state of Connecticut. My husband had accepted a position at UConn and we agreed it would be wonderful to live within driving distance of our families again. However the move would prove extremely difficult for me as for a couple of the friendships I had made in Tucson were much like family.

Team Caffeine (which is what our running group eventually dubbed itself) had its last run together with me on December 16, 2010. I can't begin to tell you how much I miss our runs, post-run coffee, and the kids playing at the park while we drank and caught up on our lives.My homesickness motivated me to plan a trip to visit them all again. In April 2011 I booked a flight to visit my dear Tucson friends for an extended Labor Day weekend in September.

Kristina and I had done the Labor Day Saguaro 8-miler last year and I immediately forwarded my itinerary and told her to sign up for the race; I would be there and we would do it again! Little did I know the tragic turn of events that would take place on a Friday evening in July.

July 15th 2011. Six years ago I welcomed my daughter, my first child, into the world. I could have never expected that on this day of celebration of her birthday I would lose a best friend. Kristina was an amazing, strong and beautiful woman. She had an awesome sense of humor. She had exceptional taste in everything culinary. She always managed to blow me away with her running and her PRs. She was intelligent and witty. She was a creative, silly, imaginative and fun mom. I always admired how she shared her love for reading with her son Frankie, the creative stories and inside jokes they would have, and the incredible lunches she would pack for him. She worked hard and kept her chin up through everything life threw at her. She was such a wonderful friend to me, generous of spirit, and had a huge heart.

My heart breaks for her, for her family, for all the lives she has touched, for all the lives she will never get the chance to touch. The world lost a beautiful person. Kristina: I will never forget the beauty and happiness you brought into my life. Every run I go on, every cup of coffee I drink, every book I read - you will be there. I'm so sorry you were taken from us. I love you. I miss you. I will never forget you.

general update

Well, here I am, back in the state I grew up in: Connecticut.

We got the seven years of snow that we missed while living in Arizona all on this first winter back. I'm sure glad I do weight training... shoveling ain't for the faint of heart.

Mr. S shoveling while the kids look on

So Mr. S is now working at UConn and we're renting a cute little dutch colonial just a hop skip and jump away from campus.

L started school at the public elementary school in town. Public schools in Arizona were 'eh' but here they're darn good and have great reviews, so I had no hesitation about her leaving Montessori to go to the more traditional school model.

L at her bus stop

E wasn't so lucky. There was a waiting list for preschool at said public school so he couldn't get in. So right now we're sending him to a daycare/preschool type place, which isn't exactly perfect, but it is something for the meantime. I might pull him out early, though, meaning before L gets out in June. It clearly doesn't meet the model that the Montessori school was committed to and I can tell. Shortly after our move, E celebrated his 4th birthday here in our new home.

E's fourth birthday

I'm pretty much just me, still. The girl who makes sure all the laundry is done, there's a meal on the table, the dishes are cleaned, the kids are dressed and on time to wherever they need to go, the groceries get shopped for, the trash gets taken out, the animals get fed, and the house gets cleaned. My guilty pleasures aside from the unrelenting duties of being a mother and wife are my coffee, my books, and my new gym I found here. I've been doing Crossfit since January of 2009, and when I moved, I knew I couldn't settle for anything else. So not too far from our new home, I found a Crossfit to call home. What was extra awesome was their membership fees were SO much cheaper than my old one! So now I can go more often and for less money. And, I'll be damned, I've got muscles. I'd never imagine having a body like this. It's sooooooo cool! I can lift stuff, move stuff, and whip my two 40# kids around like nothin'. There's something to be said for being in shape! I just wish I had been turned on to this a lot earlier in life.

OMG! Sarah's got muscles!

Which is why we've signed the kids up for soccer. Hey, they may love it, they may hate it, but I at least want them to have the opportunity to try things and find that love for being active as well. Their first soccer practice is this Saturday and I'm so excited! I'll be that mom with the camera on the sidelines :)

So spring finally came, there's color in our life again, and this strange sensation called "humidity" is becoming familiar once again. (Not to mention all the bugs that come with it.) We successfully survived our first daylight savings time change in 7 years (and didn't miss it a lick!) We are out in a fairly rural part of Connecticut, so there is wide open land and lots of farms. Occasionally traffic will stop for a giant snapping turtle (happened yesterday) or some chickens gone astray (happened last week). The kids are getting used to the odor of manure wafting through the air. (Their reactions are hilarious!) And I think overall we've adjusted pretty well. And that's the latest. I'll try and be a good blogger and check in more!

more paranoid dialogue

Want to watch some stuff to really get you nervous? Nah, forget nervous - try downright terrified.

http://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive/2010/04/17/major-vaccine-suspended-due-to-contamination-with-pig-virus.aspx

As you scroll down the article, it states that

This is also the same reason why Donald Miller, a cardiac surgeon and professor of surgery at the University of Washington, that if you choose to get your child vaccinated against polio, you request only an inactivated (dead) virus vaccine that is cultured in human cells, not monkey kidney cells.

Well, guess what? I put my kids on a highly modified vaccine schedule, that did not start until they were 18 months old. If I had my way, I wouldn't have vaccinated them AT ALL. But this was a compromise between me and my husband, who wanted them to adhere to the normal schedule. My kids just received their first polio vaccine in 2010, and to my great disapproval, my pediatrician ONLY HAD THE VACCINE THAT WAS CULTURED IN MONKEY CELLS. You can't help but feel trapped and hopeless in a situation like that, especially when the nurse working under the doctor, the one who is in charge of administering these vaccines, insists it ISN'T. Then, after you plead with her to get the vaccine booklet info out, she says, "Oh, you're right - it is cultured in monkey cells." Then you insist you don't want foreign proteins and animal DNA injected into your child, and she says that's all they have and all they can do. And then you feel so broken down and powerless against something so much bigger than yourself, that no one else seems to even bat an eyelash about.

And now there is evidence linking viruses found in these vaccines that used monkey tissue to causing CANCER.

SV40, a cancer-causing monkey virus. The puzzle began in 1994, when Dr. Michele Carbone, a Loyola University researcher, found the virus SV40, which had never before been detected in humans, in half of the human lung tumors he was studying. Since then, 60 different lab studies have confirmed the results, and SV40 has been found in a variety of human cancers, including lung-, brain-, bone-, and lymphatic cancer.

http://articles.mercola.com/sites/articles/archive/2011/02/18/leading-vaccine-doctor-states-cancer-linked-to-polio-vaccine.aspx

God help us all. It's more than I can bear.

for the birthday girl

got entrails?

"...and by the way it's not really a moral hazard it's more like free riding on our grandkids."

I don't even know what to think or say regarding this. Conspiracy theory? A valid and subjective analysis of given facts? What do YOU think? Seems like there is so much information out there in the world, that sometimes I don't know what to think or believe. I want to have faith in mankind and the greater good, but honestly I am sometimes terrified by what is going on.

FYI, Contrails, (short for "condensation trails") or vapour trails, are artificial clouds that are the visible trails of condensed water vapour made by the exhaust of aircraft engines. As the hot exhaust gases cool in the surrounding air they may precipitate a cloud of microscopic water droplets. If the air is cold enough, this trail will comprise tiny ice crystals.