I must say I have been so fortunate in the past year to have met so many great people here in Arizona. One of my closest friends was brought to me through graduate school, and many others from being a new mom and becoming involved in various mom-baby groups.
I have met some pretty special and amazing people. I am blessed.
As a child I was a bit unusual in a few senses. I still am in some, too. Being an only child I was seldom exposed to children my own age. My mother would brag how good I was with adults/how verbally advanced I was; however as good of a quality that was it was also problematic. That is predominantly all I was ever exposed to: adults, aside from the occasional visit with my cousins. When I began to attend preschool the instructors noted my complete lack of socialization: They addressed my mother out of concern saying I would simply skip around the room singing songs to myself and playing by myself all day, every day.
Things didn't change much in elementary school, but I did get the hang of normal socialization rituals. I went to birthday parties and had play dates. I was a brownie and went to Rock Camp. But I never had a 'best buddy' like so many young girls do. I had acquaintances/friends. I didn't know how to relate to people my age, though, which is why those sorts of relationships never blossomed into a deeper connection and friendship. The people I got along the most comfortably with in grammar school were the teachers themselves.
I finally got the hang of it later in life. A late bloomer. Now I can't imagine my life without peers.
I am making it a point to provide L with countless opportunities to meet others of and around her age and socialize. I don't want her to go through the difficulties I had. The feeling of missing out and being left out. The feeling of being "weird" "unusual" and "misunderstood". Childhood can be tough enough without that crap.
3 comments:
This may sound odd but my oldest and only daughter, used to do the same things you did; she entertained herself, and was content to play off to herself.
I always thought it was because she was glad to get a break from her little brother. I think now it is more of a part of who she is.
She has to have her alone time. Her veg time, and if people are around during that time...she tries to ignore them.
When she was fifteen she asked to move her bedroom to the guest house, that lived in the back yard. It was a bedroom, and half bath, with a closet. To her it was sanctuary.
Come to think of it, it kept the two of us, she and I, from pulling each other's hair out...I can’t believe I am copping to that.
I enjoyed this post, and I like hearing about how you grew to being who you are. Love and stuff, Lori
My daughter is an "only" too, I used to drive her to playgrounds and fast food ball pits, just so she could play with others. Just like you, she could hold "adult' conversations with her preschool teachers :)
She tells me now that she likes being the only one. Being a mom is so much work! Always trying to make everything ideal for them.
Sounds like you are doing a great job, Sarah.
You are so right, Sarah!!!
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